Should I have this contemptuous name for the sake of my children?

Dear Abby: After 15 years of marriage – some happy and some terrifying – I am divorcing my husband.

We have two beautiful, wonderful children together. I would love to have the same surname as him, but I can’t imagine keeping my husband’s last name. His family was terrible to me during our entire marriage.

What should I do? Should I keep his last name so that I can have the same ones as my children, or should I change it back to my maternal one?

moving to texas

Moving on dear: It’s not the ’50s. There is no shame in having a different name than your children. Many women with children change their names after divorce.

Because your married name has painful connotations, feel free to use your maiden name on the resume, or adopt another name you like. (Some women choose the name of their preferred city for adoption.)

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